…I’m secretly obsessed with all the terrorist activities occurring in Graceland, glued to my smartHub every free moment I get, whether it’s a break at work or during the daily zigzag on the bus, I can’t disentangle my thoughts from the news, and much of my time is spent keeping score in the asymmetric warfare that is as much a spectator sport as football, and nearly as national in these provincial times…

…I received a contraption in the mail the other day that could have been from Babylonian times, it was so intricately packed with hoses and suction cups and chambered inner walls…

…I had tried to remain apolitical most of my life because I was enlightened in ways that made other people uncomfortable…

…To live and survive in Graceland you must be a scumbag or well on your way to becoming one…

…The true radicalism lies in the workplace. The things I got away with in the office I couldn’t even pull off on a gonzo paintball terrain. I had invested ten years into my current job for the sheer pleasure of sinking my fangs into somebody’s else’s neck…

…When a country is at peace it turns its gaze within; that’s what one of my old bosses told me. It’s how a country strengthens itself. Always standing on its toes. Being in a constant state of readiness…

…The rat race went guerilla a long time before I got onboard and daddy wants a set of gold fangs…

…It’s the same people who hit the gym after dark and sweat all over the machines without ever wiping them down, secretly hoping to transmit some secret communication via their perspiration…

…Soon I was starting little bonfires on the washroom tiles to placate the Horned Beast, neo-pagan style, sprinkling loose matches onto the lit plicated paper that sparked up like human sacrifices from the dark ages…

…I reached into my pocket and took out the golden poppy pill-tube that contained the designer anti-anxiety pills that cost me thirty-five dollars per…

…before me stood three Lagados that would weigh out the contents of my stomach the way God casts judgment upon all sinners, that is, with balance scales and a wide sword…

…Nothing confirms your identity like the contents of your bowels…

…We’ve come so far into the future with technology at our command but it’s still our shit that authenticates our identities…